No wood

It didn’t bother me at all. The gift was received and although I planned to come back for it, I did leave it.  No one had stayed in site fifty nine the last night I left and stayed at mustang hollow for the night.  The next day, the second cold and wet rainy day that I got back to site fifty nine, I was looking forward to a nice warm fire.  The thought kinda keep me moving that day.  Yet, when I looked at the fire pit, no wood.

I remember writing the story about the wood and I’m glad I did, the story will last longer than the wood did.  Even if it had stuck around long enough for me to burn it the next night. Yet it didn’t, and the story is still here. Well enough, I suppose, fires are amazing- and I really hope someone enjoyed it.  Yet, it didn’t bother me.  And yet, all week, I kept thinking about it.

I really, really like Lake Corpus Christi State Campground. It is a nice place.  Beautiful location, amazing staff, super friendly- and they’re willing to accept Amazon packages addressed to your site number- very convenient for me. In the just over seven weeks since I left Michigan, I spent one week on the first roadtrip, a week at the beach, a night at the hollow, and the remaining five weeks there.

I could draw a map easily of the catfish cove asphalt loops and trails through the brush country. And I can remember my neighbors, all of them that I met while I was there.  Just this morning, two neighbors are back- Joe & Chris, and their families.  Even Bill and Betty were back at the lake today and stopped by my site to visit, twice. (As I was on the phone the first time.)

I misestimated again on the time it would take to go this morning. Just pack the tent and go I said.  Tent and tarps, in the morning, then go. I could have rushed and left by ten; or at least on time by noon.  Nope.  Didn’t want to I guess.  Much better to get three large tarps folded perfectly.  Much better to spend extra time picking up all the wiring scraps from my projects.  Much better to delay enough so I knew I couldn’t try a one day push to get the Jal.

Tons of anxiety today and doubt I suppose. Go to the beach, stay in Mathis, go to New Mexico, go to Michigan. Lots on my mind with my financial realities at hand.  I haven’t been able to work in fifteen months and I’m well past the point were I should have first filed for disability.  I don’t want that reality for myself, to be dependent. Another part of this journey I suppose, finding another way.

That doesn’t bother me either.  Not at all. Disabled is just differently abled.  I kept feeling stuck today.  I wanted to get to Jal.

Yet the phone rang and people were visiting and I kept trying to perfectly fold the tarp. Oh well, I made it out- after cleaning my site and taking one last nice hot shower- four pm.  Not really time to go anywhere.. I thought how easily I could stay just one, just one more day.

And my anxiety kicked up another notch. I had to get out of there.  Hello Choke Canyon state park.  Only here for the night.  Sitting in the car here to post, and the car is still fully loaded.  I could sleep in the car, and turn the key the moment I wake up, yet I don’t want to sleep in the car.  So, what to do? Well I could pitch the tent, yet for a single night stay, that seems like a lot of work to me.

Last night when I went to lay down, the air mattress was flat and I did not feel like trying to find the pump.  No worries, I do like a firm bed, sleeping on concrete or hard wet sand is not a problem for me.  Cold though, is a problem.  I had noticed it the night before, that the mattress was getting low, and letting parts of me contact the cold concrete- and it is cold.

Easy solution in my tarped shelter, I slept on the picnic table.  One folded blanket under me and in the mummy bag, I was warm, very warm and cozy.  By morning when I woke the wooden boards of the table had taken on my warmth and insulated me all the more.  So easy too I thought, that I think I’ll try it again tonight.  Everything I unload tonight simply has to be packed again, so, unpack nothing.

The sleeping bag is in the top of my camp bag, one bag out, walk over to my assigned shelter (one ones here have the same four post and ceiling as at Lake Corpus Christi, yet also one wall for windbreak. I think that sounds like enough to me.  Soon, very soon, it’s calling my name.

Last thought, I went to Walmart last night while I was in Alice, and wouldn’t you know, I ran into someone I knew, again.

Randy Bates, the park ranger who first told me about New Mexico last month when I was still in site seventy eight. We’ve had a few more conversations since that first one and I was glad to ran into him, as I hadn’t caught his name yet.

Oh, a sad thought too: leaving Jackson, including leaving TV, news, email, MLive and so much more.  Yet, so many people I know and love are there, so I keep one very small attachment. An mlive subscription to the local obituary columns. Once or twice a week in my inbox, you know, just so I don’t miss anything I guess.  I don’t know what I was thinking, yet that is what I did. This week, I got sad news in that email.  A friend has passed.  A friend I haven’t been in touch with in a decade at least, maybe two.

Yet, GB was my friend.  I liked him a lot and I’m not sure why. I can’t say that I knew him well, we both loved shooting pool, and we both had issue drinking too much in the year or two we were close. The obit said he was living out west somewhere, and I didn’t even know he wasn’t in Jackson anymore.

No wood made me sad, yet I did get fire.  One cardboard box is good for kindling, yet a dozen or two is a fire in itself.  Just a collection of Amazon boxes delivered for site fifty nine.  It was close to two am when I took this picture. Maybe not as amazing as a wood fire, yet the timeline was perfect.  Nice big burn and gone in twenty minutes so I could go to sleep.

Eleven thirty four, time to finish this post, grab my sleeping bag and go spread out on picnic table.

Tomorrow (God willing) will be an early start to NM.

Time to rest.

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