Why do I start so late? I’d like to get to bed on time tonight, though I woke feeling good, I didn’t sleep very well last night. The last half of the night I kept tossing and turning, and I think I may have been dreaming (oh, and just a few days late for inclusion in my Psych homework.)
The last good crack really did a number on me- in a very good way. My hips have been swinging side to side, it feels like my body is straight again, almost. I have about another half inch of muscle to stretch out I think. Trying to stand up as straight as I can and hold my knees back as far as they will go and I can almost, almost feel like I could lift my left toes, but I can’t. So, more stretching.
I had gotten to bed late last night and the ocean was still playing when the alarm went off, no matter I was already awake. Quite a bit sore this morning, I over did some of my exercises last night and I could feel an evened pain and tightness across the outside of both hips, reaching up into my side abs… Even on both sides though, that’s when I know its more likely the exercise than the spasms.
Through the routine, downstairs, skipped breakfast yet had a boost shake instead- I probably should have had both. On the school and I was a minute or two behind, yet still ahead of the teacher. This morning I got to meet Ashley, she’s from Michigan Center and even attended the same elementary school as I did. We only had a few minutes to chat before the teacher arrived, mostly about some local architecture out that way. I will say, she is a keen listener, tight eye contact and quickly responsive with micro expressions throughout.
Another good class, starting with the necessary lecture to keep up on the class work, yet the teacher also began to describe a coming group activity for next Monday and we did the required pre-rereading in our groups today. Again, this class seems non-responsive and I can see and feel the teacher cold calling me with her eyes to fill the empty spaces. I delayed this morning, letting her opening gamut lay out in the air.
She restated- we had just been shown a four minute video pertaining to history, humanities and colonialism in Africa over the last one hundred years. “Does anyone have any thoughts about this?”
“Anything at all- what did you see, what to you think?”
Glancing at me on the second asking I smiled and turned to survey the room, moving my head back and forth, looking for any signs of stirring, she the same from the front, and by time I looked back to front myself, she was asking one last time, I reckoned from the trailing tone, “Any questions about this…” and I raised my hand. A smile and a nod and it was another speaking event.
Good, bad, or ugly. If I open my mouth, words fall out. Oh, I do try to make the good words- good words lead to good stories. That gift of gab preceded of course this current gift I am enjoying at my keyboard, yet I’m sure it comes from the same place, as it is most certainly fueled in the same way internally. These moments (hours,) at the keyboard give me plenty of time to pause and think, which in a way makes this task more difficult- more accountable I should be when I have time to review before I click publish.
Live speaking, that is more like free fall. All the same though, feel my small quiet voice inside- the calm and patient voice, the voice the can breath slowly as I draw out my words, thinking ahead just fast enough to ensure I’m aiming this sentence at the next, then both restating the problems I saw- no real conversation begins without that. Then I restated a few more recent events, such as the renaming of MLK Drive in Jackson several years ago, and talked of the solutions have been had and finally- once a conversation began with a few more participants, I quickly backed down, so much more content to listen to the thoughts of others. I did reply to one final comment though, as I another student had questioned the value of an apology sought and I couldn’t let it go without an answer.
Perhaps I should verbally strike myself- let the echos of silent room berate each student until someone raises their had- or volunteer to cold answer any question she likes (I have stood in bigger halls and have been questioned by many more,) when called upon and simple never raise my hand again.
Then again, many of the students do seem to give quite a bit of eye contact and focus when I speak, and more often than not, I’ve been able to leave a few ‘spurs’ in my comments to successful stimulate success conversations. One student in particular on the other side of the room always seems to pay attention- or is just that every time I finish speaking, I turn towards her to be rewarded with a warm smile? Perhaps I should be looking somewhere else. Ha- seriously, I should have gone to college twenty years ago. <smh>
This teacher had mentioned teaching early to me this week, and Monday night I’d gotten into a friendly conversation with another teacher that shared some of the ‘inside’ aspects of the work. I suppose, if nothing else by then, I could aim for a Masters (or whatever other minimum,) so that I could become and ‘adjunct’ professor. Ha. That would be okay I guess, I think that just means part time teacher.
Arguably, I just need to go through the curriculum and I’d be able to teach more than a handful of my class. I don’t have the film knowledge, yet I could teach a group to compose writing- how to think in words, easy. Humanities, no problem. The gov class, cinch. I’m not really sure what a PT teacher does all day, so I’ll leave that out, and yeah, I could teach the psych class too, if the current teacher left his slideshows and I pre-studied before each class.
However, I am doing my best to glean as much as I can from these classes- the content is the given. Each of my four in person teachers have the current experience of teaching this material, the hopeful benefits of years repeating the same courses in their fields, and so far have shown their own unique skills in conveying information, managing their classrooms, and mostly, engaging their students.
How to engage a student? What kind of a person asks that question if not a teacher? Why not, if I can teach Sunday School and Skydiving, why not college classes? Ha.
Almost funny. Okay, I need some to fill the “I’m going to be a ______ when I grow up.” Who knew it would be a liberal arts major so I could be an adjunct professor while thriving as a disabled athlete and running for Council every couple years. Ha. Okay, we’ll see if this goal holds long enough for Jackson College to hire me to teach their students. That’ll be the day.
Humanities then I ended up leaving for lunch- Coneys at Virginia- then home for a bowl and to play with my APRSC server and the APRS Track Direct mapping website. That project has not been a priority, yet with all my recent driving I really wanted to get it online and working (regardless of the extra work caused by the duplicate packets, yet that is a whole other topic.) So I did, http://map.jeromyalexander.com. I’m glad I don’t worry about stalkers.
Then back to the college for English- one worksheet and I was out of class by 3:45 and on the way back home. Smoked a bowl, took more Tylenol, checked the results on the mapping server. I’m not processing a map of over 100 APRS packets per second over the entire global- the realtime GPS position of thousands of RF connected radio amateurs.
I didn’t feel like it, I just hurt to much, yet after missing last week I didn’t want to miss another week of pool league. When I had accepted Rickies offer to join the team, I had not yet started college and I had a wide open schedule. Now, I know how exhausted I am from these days, yet- darn it, I like to shoot pool, so I will. I’ll just have to figure out how to get my homework done on another night.
Tomorrow is the appointment, finally with an AFO- an ankle and foot orthopedic doctor. I hope for answers. I hope for a good comfortable walking brace.
Time to rest.
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